WHERE IS MORE IMPORTANT THAN WHERE YOU ARE NOW?

               WHERE IS MORE IMPORTANT

                THAN WHERE YOU ARE NOW?
          © Chessie Roberts2010, all rights reserved

When I was a teenager the trend of the day for the girls was to wash and roll your hair in the morning and to keep the rollers in until time for your ‘special event’ of the day. Your ‘event’ could be a date, shopping with your friends or going out to dinner with the family, anything would do for the main happening for the day. My Mother and I would argue horribly over this particular teenage tradition. One day I was reading a newspaper column by Ann Landers where she asked a (what was for me) life changing question.

“Where are you going that is more important than where you are now?”

I was recently reminded of this question when I was talking to a friend of mine. He was lamenting the fact that he had not had a good time at a play that he had attended. I asked what had happened to keep him from enjoying the play and he told me that the lights had been turned down and he could not read the book he wanted to read. I would have thought he would have been watching the play that he had paid to attend rather than reading a book. Who does that I asked myself?

I soon discovered that even on camping trips people are playing video games, texting (and being annoyed by incoming texts), talking on cell phones and being upset by weak signals to their appliances. Even getting to the woods, children must now be entertained with movies rather than paying attention to what is outside the car window. My thought is why go camping if you are going to stay tethered?

As I work with people in the Evolution of Self program, I find that many people are very unhappy because they are trying to be in more places than where they physically are. I can see that there are times when this is required but not every minute of the day. (I also learned that our minds do not actually multi-task, they just do more than one thing poorly.)

Start looking at where you are now, what you are supposed to be doing now and concentrate on that, be in that ‘now’. Don’t worry about where you will need to be in the next hour or day and do your best where you are now. Begin asking yourself, “Where is more important than where I am right now?” Make your ‘now’ as important as your ‘later’ so that you stay focused. Then, when you finish that time frame move on to the next.

Anticipation is a good thing but not to the detriment of you being in your ‘now’. Learn to enjoy the ‘now’ no matter where or what it is and you will find that your days go by better and your enjoyment of life increases.
Bright Blessings, Chessie

THE TWO MOST POWERFUL WORDS

THE TWO MOST POWERFUL WORDS IN THE          LANGUAGE

©Chessie Roberts 2010 all rights reserved

Do you find yourself becoming argumentative and defensive over the slightest thing? Does it seem to you that others are not getting with your program? Could it be that you are attempting to exercise control over something you can’t or should not be controlling?

If these issues are in your life, you need to learn about the two most powerful words in any language, “Let go.” I f you will ask yourself a few questions you will see very quickly how and where to use these wonderful words.

When you are pressing a point ask if the point is truly important. Will it be important in ten minutes? How about one month? A Year? If the subject is so trivial as to be lost in the next ten minutes, why waste time, energy, and frustration on it in the first place? Let it go. If in a months’ time the point is not something worth remembering, then why pursue it? See how that works?

Secondly ask yourself why it is important to you to be the ‘winner’ of this particular argument/difference of opinion? Is the subject of the argument important enough to agree to disagree? If not, it is not important enough to argue about in the first place. Remember that everyone has an opinion and rarely are two just alike and that is ok but to have to be correct all of the time about everything (no matter how trivial) sais that there deeper issues of control that need to occupying you time.

As you learn how to let go of the small things and be OK with that, the larger things will be easier to let go of as well. Letting go will de-clutter your life and make the more important things (those truly important) clearer so that you can take care of them in a positive and balanced way.

Bright Blessings, Chessie

WHEN YOU CHANGE WHAT YOU THINK ABOUT

WHEN YOU CHANGE WHAT YOU THINK ABOUT

        WHAT YOU THINK ABOUT CHANGES
                  © Chessie Roberts 2010, all rights reserved

Do you find yourself having conversations with your ‘self’ about what you should have done or said in any given circumstance? How about what you think SHOULD have happened or how you SHOULD have reacted to fill in the blank?

When we talk to ourselves, we call it thinking but what we are really doing is actually talking to “self” about something that is bothering us. It can be anything, a disturbing incident, an angry encounter, a close call. You notice that I didn’t list anything ‘good’ here. That is because, as people, we don’t usually rehash the good, just the bad.

The worse the trauma, the more we go through it in our heads later. We grind on it, rewriting the scenario over and over again. Most of the time, within our rewrite, we come out the clever hero, besting our antagonist and making them feel as bad as we did in the original incident.

The reason for this is that’s how we handled this type of thing when we were children. A little person will tell you the same tale of trauma until you feel that you can’t stand to hear it again but, that is how they ‘talk themselves down’.

As we mature, we learn to keep most of these things to ourselves, but they do have a tendency to pop out somewhere else if we are not vigilant. One of the ways; as we mature into more positive people, we can handle this process is to change what we are thinking about. We do this by learning proper self-talk. I.e. writing a better script in our heads.

The way to start the re-write is to go for the positive in all of your daily encounters. Look at whatever is going on (in ANY situation) and ask yourself, “What makes this situation positive?” (I keep that sign hanging right by my computer so that I don’t forget). Next, ask yourself “What are my assets?” These two questions will change the focus of your thoughts to a more positive slant.

The other thing that you can do to get your thoughts moving in a positive direction is to keep a journal with you at all times (just until you get used to thinking this way). Every time you come up with a less than desirable thought, write it down. If you can change it to a positive statement at the time, go, ahead and do it, if not, wait until you have some quiet time and refer back to your notes. Then rewrite the statement in the proper positive language.

EXAMPLE: “That stupid jerk nearly ran me off the road! I wonder where he got his driver’s license, Hasbro.” CORRECTION: “I am so glad he missed me, I hope he gets where he is going safely.”

It might sound a bit corny, but it really does work. As you begin to change your inner vocabulary, your thoughts will turn toward a more positive flow. This flow will, in turn, change what occupies your mind. As that focus changes you will find that your vibrations rise and, consequently, your life will flow better as well because, when you change what you think about, what you think about changes.

Bright Blessings, Chessie