YOU WILL LOVE YOU WHEN?

  

              YOU WILL LOVE YOU WHEN?

                                               © Chessie Roberts 2012 all rights reserved

My husband and I were reminiscing about life in general a few weeks ago. We started with childhood and remembered all the way up to our current relationship. As we talked, I was taken with the patterns that evolved throughout our lives that were so very similar. We both grew up in military families and there was some favoritism for our siblings from the parents. We both had the “changing schools and being left behind” issues that most, if not all military children are familiar with. The ways we overcame some of our 'stuff' was the same or close to it. We have both had the same faith revelations over the years and we have decided that we have done fairly well in our evolution.

The thing that I found fascinating was the fact that we have seen each other in our worse situations and still love each other despite that. I commented to him about this aspect of life and he replied, “When we are at our worse is when we need each other the most.” I have to say that this relationship is one I never saw coming and had only read about. I won't say we read each other's minds, but rarely do we need interpretation. Our comfort level is astounding. Neither of us has anything to prove and we answer each other with complete honesty. I have heard that complete honesty is not doable, but I so do not agree anymore.

Cross words are rarely, if ever spoken and comfortable silence is just that, comfortable. We don't have the need to talk unless there is something of merit to say. We laugh a lot and often and unconditional love, understanding, tolerance, open communication and music are the ties that bind.

Waiting for someone to come along while being comfortable in your own skin is not the easiest of endeavors but well worth the effort. On the other hand, finding someone that you feel you can change to meet your needs is completely counterproductive and not worthy of you. The only person you can change is you. Attempting to change another is much like trying to push a rope, don't waste your time and energy.

All happiness comes from within YOU, all change comes from within YOU, all love comes from within YOU, all peace comes from within YOU. So when will you choose to love...YOU?

“May the entire Universe be filled with Peace and Joy, Love and Light. May the light of Truth overcome all darkness! Victory to that Light! Jai!” Bright Blessings, C. S. Roberts 

THOUGHTS ON WHY WE CRY WHEN SOMEBODY DIES

THOUGHTS ON WHY WE CRY WHEN SOMEBODY DIES

My husband and I experienced the sudden loss of a wonderful friend yesterday. His death struck us both profoundly and deeply. We were both surprised because we weren't terribly close to the person. But we did both like him very much.

Because we both believe in reincarnation and understand that when someone dies it is their time to do so, no matter how old or young are; no matter how “good” or “bad” humanity perceives them to be, no matter any judgment placed on them to categorize them. We feel that when it is time to go, one goes. Yes, we mourn with the families, however, we rejoice with the one who has left us for that is a joyful thing for them no matter how it occurs, they have gone home.

We know and understand the seven stages of grief; First is shock and denial; The Second is pain and guilt; Third is anger and bargaining; Forth is depression, reflection and loneliness; Fifth is the upward turn; Sixth is reconstruction and working through it all; and Seventh is acceptance and hope. We have experienced all of them both together and separately but never before all at the same time.

Now this leads me to the thoughts about why we cry when some one passes out of our lives. As I understand our anatomy, we have three different kinds of tears and the ones we use at this time are the third kind; the ones we produce when our body reacts to something on an emotional level. Each type of tear contains different amounts of chemical proteins and hormones. Scientists have discovered that the emotional tears contain higher levels of manganese and the hormone called prolactin. As we cry our body experiences a reduction of both of these. This reduction helps us to keep depression away. Many people have found that crying actually calms them after being upset, and this is in part due to the chemicals and hormones that are released in the tears. The emotions that create this feeling, this need are many and varied. They also occur in different intensity in different people.

Science aside, we cry because we FEEL like it. This particular passing hit us so hard (even if only for a few hours) that it made us question and examine our individual and collective response to it. What I have gathered from this experience is that perhaps humanity is connected on such deep levels that most, even the scientists are totally unaware of it. Most of the time, society doesn't react to the passing of someone that is not a close friend or relation unless it is on a huge national level, like when the towers were hit on 9-11 or a well publicized incident such as a child trapped in a well or hikers lost in the wilderness. I think most of us have experienced these. But to feel so deeply, so profoundly about a connection to a passing such as this, makes me think there may be more to our human connection than we have realized.

Was he a friend? Yes. Was he a dear person that we liked to interact with? Yes. Were we connected by the love of the same thing (music in this case)? Yes. Did he support us in our musical endeavors? Yes. Did we love him as a friend and colleague? Yes. BUT we weren't what you would call “close” but we were “connected” and I feel that connection may have been the reason we felt his loss so acutely. As I write this I keep getting a mental picture of grass. We see it as different blades but in truth most grasses are one large organism that is linked by its roots, underground where we don't see the connection. The other mental image I get is of bees. They communicate and are connected in ways we don't see. Come to think of it the entire animal kingdom is connected on subtle levels the we humans are only now just beginning to understand. So I am deeply contemplating our true connection and what it really means to the human animal. If we could/would become as aware of our earthly as well as our spiritual connection to each other, the animals, our planet and our Source, maybe...just maybe we would all be better off?

Bright Blessings and Awareness to you all, Chessie

© 2012, Chessie Roberts, all rights reserved

THE SEASON OF WHAT???

THE SEASON OF WHAT???

“Please accept without obligation, express or implied, these best

 wishes for an environmentally safe, socially responsible, low stress,

 non-addictive, and gender neutral celebration of the winter solstice

 holiday as practiced within the most enjoyable traditions of the

 religious persuasion of your choice (but with respect for the religious

 or secular persuasions and/or traditions of others, or for...... their

 choice not to practice religious or secular traditions at all) and

 further for a fiscally successful, personally fulfilling, and medically

 uncomplicated onset of the generally accepted calendar year

 (Including, but not limited to, the Christian calendar, but not without

t due respect for the calendars of choice of other cultures). The

 preceding wishes are extended without regard to the race, creed,

 color, age, physical ability, religious faith, choice of computer

 platform, or sexual preference of the wishes.”

I saw this posted on Facebook the other day and had to ask myself

 what in the world is going on in the minds and hearts of people these

 days. Everyone is so hell bent on having their way with this season it

 makes my head spin and my soul ache. The whole mess started as a

 SEASONAL celebration. It had nothing to do who was born when or

 what religion should take credit for it. It was the realization that the

 darkest and coldest half of the year had arrived and was a celebration

 of light to coax the warmth and heat of the sun back into dominance.

This celebration was done with closeness of family, friend and

 community. It was done with feasting, sharing, hope, closeness of

 people for support against the cold and dark comradeship and love.

 It was a communal affair. It brought people TOGETHER!

This time of the year has been called many things by many people

 over the millennia, and they are all correct. Because of the diversity

 of people, there have been a diversity of traditions (each one

 borrowed and built on from those before and around it) and each

 tradition speaks to its celebrants in its own unique way, and this is

 good. One does NOT need to take precedence over the other. The

 Creator did not intend us to act in such a domineering manner about

 this (or any other holiday) that we strip all the joy of celebration

 from it. We are all here on this planet, in this life to learn how to love

 each other not to see how many we can kill or brow-beat into our

 way of thinking. Statements like the one quoted above should not be

 required. We should be Spiritually Mature enough by now to

 understand that though there is but one Truth, there are many paths

 to it. We should be able to allow the other person to find their way

without guilt, condemnation, sermons and snarky barbs to herd them

 into our personal belief mold.

Wake up Dear people and learn to allow each person (including you)

 their own relationship with their own personal path to the truth. If

 you feel that you need to intercede, I must ask you if your faith is so

 small that you don't trust the Creator to handle these things? Are you

 so presumptuous as to believe that if you don't instruct them, they

 will wander, lost in the dark? The author J.R.R. Tolkien said that

 “All who wander are not lost.” and this is true. If you tend to your

 business, your spirituality and your true responsibilities you will find

 that your reason for the season is clearer... to you; is more

 meaningful...To you, is happier, more joy and love filled as well as

 stress free...for you and is much saner and more sacred for

 EVERYONE!

I wish you all the love, kindness and joy or your seasonal path and

 Bright Blessings, Chessie

© Chessie Roberts 2011, all rights reserved

LIVING BY SURRENDER VS LIVING BY COMMITTEE

LIVING BY SURRENDER

 VS 

LIVING BY COMMITTEE

“You have been brought up to believe that your life has to be a certain way, where in truth and reality it does not have to be any way.” {Robert Adams}

Lets start with the way most of us do things, by committee. You have an idea for what you want do this weekend. How many people do you ask for their opinion of what you should do? All the while you know what you want to do but because you are worried about what others in your circles, you ask their advice. Now here is the kicker, you decide that because a majority of your committee says that they “love the wine tour and you should go” that is what you do. You find that while it's nice, it is unfulfilling to you and you wonder why. After a few days of questioning your ability to have fun you realize that you would have much rather gone rafting on the river, in the quiet, alone but, you didn't because your committee would think you’re weird. 

Here is what you have done; sacrificed your true happiness to the opinion of those around you, your committee. These are those people that you have surrounded yourself with that tell you what to do so that you don't have to take responsibility for your choices. You can blame them for not having a good time, after all you only did what they suggested, right? You have put yourself into a master slave type of relationship and, if you look around you will find that you are in several different ones.

This committee thing is done anytime we want our friends to be excited, angry, vindictive, or even happy with us. It is a way of garnering support for our drama. With backing we don't have to take any responsibility for any unpleasant outcome that may happen. Your committee will shield your connection to your surrender point and as long as you continue to rely on them the longer you keep your drama high and your growth from manifesting. When you submit to authority of any group; the church, parents and bosses, friends, doctors, teachers, any committee; you are putting yourself into the master-slave relationship rather than in spiritual partnership with the part of you that has your best outcome in mind.

As you begin to grow into your higher power and understanding of all that entails and you start to get back in touch with your self; you begin to learn how to listen to your guidance; the little voice/feeling inside that tells you what is really in your best interests, and, by surrendering to your guidance, your Higher Self, what you actually surrender is your ego (that is the part that keeps you limited and small) This process is much like a drop of water surrendering/merging with the ocean or a seed surrendering to the earth. When the drop surrenders to the ocean, the drop becomes the ocean. When the seed surrenders to the earth, it becomes the plant. Seeds that do not surrender do not grow, they die and go to dust, they waste their potential. If people don't surrender they don't grow, they wither and die.

First you must realize that you have a committee that you go to, who they are and which of your dramas they each support (you may find you have more than one committee.) Second you must decide whether you want to die or grow. Then act on your decision and choose to change your thoughts and actions. To alter your internal climate to calmer climes and thought patterns. Ask your self what is really going on inside your mind. Why are you calling this person or that one, what is your payoff. Then choose to realize the you have all your answers already, you do not need backup. Friendship is one thing but drama support is quite another, one that you can do better without.

First, you learn to truly love yourself, that will spread to the ability to truly love others and then to the connection that allows total surrender to (don't get bogged down in semantics here) Love, God Consciousness, Source, Creation; whatever you wish to call it. You will begin act in the best interest of both you and those around you.  This will happen spontaneously and effortlessly. The higher you vibrate, the easier this is. You will start to experience a Divine detachment from drama of all kinds and the need for the opinions of your committees. 

The Love of which I am speaking is an all-inclusive and beautiful thing. It sees the Divine play of consciousness in all things; Love for what love truly is rather than what you have thought it was in the past. This will create in you the desire to be the best person you can be and to create the best outcomes in all that you do whether it is washing dishes or writing a masterpiece; it will be an effort worthy of you. All of this will start an upward spiral of higher vibrations, love, more worthy actions, higher vibrations, love, more worthy actions etc. Soon the committees and concern over what others think will be a thing of the past and not worth your recall. This conscious choice to lift yourself out of the mundane and into the Love of the Universe is a huge step into your goal of wholeness.

Bright Blessings, Light, Love and Laughter, Chessie

© Chessie Roberts 2011, all rights reserved.

ABOUT UNCONDITIONAL LOVE

 ALL ABOUT LOVE

© Rev. C.S. Roberts 2011, all rights reserved

 

I officiate a lot of weddings and usually write a ceremony that reflects what the couple is focused on for their life together. I get all kinds of topic requests for this focus; family, children, blended families, ancestors, people and pets joining, two becoming one...the list is long. Recently I was asked to write a wedding ceremony that was all and only about love.

This was new and I 'love' the idea. As I began to consider the couple’s request I was pleasantly surprised at the resulting creation...but why should it be anything but wonderful with love as its focus? After reading it I decided to take out all of the directions and the family names and share it with you.

As we anticipate the upcoming shift, change, whatever you wish to call it; because it fits so well in all aspects of life, what better topic to embrace than love? I share now with you the dissertation on love, the most important emotion you can embrace. (the words in parenthesis are add ins for this blog)

 

We are gathered this day to celebrate love in all its forms but especially the love that makes a life commitment between two people (humans, God and the planet).

This type of love is not afraid to make promises and work to keep them. It seeks not only to be, but to continue. It is based as much, if not more, on the hopes for the future as on the pleasures of the present.

 

This unconditional love does not manipulate or try to change, it allows both (all things) to be who (and what) they were; growing into who (and what) they are, all the while encouraging them to rise into who (and what) they will become. It is a letting go of all expectations and is an embracing with full acceptance, trust and celebration of your mortal person-hood (and its connection to source and your home planet).

Unconditional love in its mature state understands and realizes the joy that comes from knowing that each of you is happy; both in the others company and out of it; it is to give fully with no expectation of return but receiving anyway, and it is trusting completely. Love, true unconditional love, needs no reason for its existence, it just is.

 

Knowing what love, in its purest state, is only half of this equation. The other half is to understand that marriage (whether between people or you with yourself or with your life in general) is not just a simple love affair but it is a bit of an ordeal; an ordeal of the sacrifice of your ego to this new relationship (whatever that may be). The relationship of two becoming one while keeping your individual centers; of creating another family within families requires such a sacrifice. Therefore, sacrifice not one to the other but to your relationship.

 

We as humans are born of stardust and deepest oceans, of erupting volcanoes and the bones of the earth. In creating and celebrating this union you are celebrating the heritage of all of these things and the love of all humans from the dawn of time. In making this commitment to love, honor and respect each other, you share that which is best in all of us and give a moment of light to the world. (The more we connect through love, the better off everyone/thing will be)

 

Do you now commit to each other in love, honor and respect?

 

Do you now promise to communicate in love and kindness with each other even when you fear you may distress the other?

 

Do you promise to commit to your own wellbeing, of body, mind and spirit so that you can relate to each other in a loving, positive and healthy way in order to provide a healthy home for each other?

 

Do you commit to support and comfort each other in times of illness and health as long as love shall last?

 

Look at the one you love and tell them what is in your heart.

 

Behold these rings those who witness; bind these children by their troth; let them grow in love together, love now joined is never lost.

 

Heart to thee, life to thee, now and forever so mote it be

 

It is done; two are one,

 

We, our planet, our Source are one. No ceremony is needed, only remembering and reconnecting on a conscious, aware level is required. Decide today to embrace unconditional love for yourself and all around you and grow in strength, peace and grace. Love, Light, Laughter and Bright Blessings, Reverend C. S. Roberts

Religion VS Faith; What's Love Got To Do With It?

Religion VS Faith: What's Love Got To Do With It?

 

The dictionary definition of Religion is “a set of beliefs concerning the cause, nature and beliefs of the universe. Involving devotional and ritual observances, often containing a moral code for the conduct of human affairs.

 

About Faith, the dictionary says; it is a confidence or trust in a person or thing; a belief that is not based on proof.

 

Love has many definitions and none of them accurately describe the love I am speaking of here so I will come back to it in a minute.

 

Religion has seemingly evolved to be the structure and ritual of the thing. The basic tenets are mouthed and gone through weekly on the prescribed day and time in the prescribed order and with the appointed facial expression and body attitude. I remember watching the grownups coming and going to and from the altar on Sunday with the oddest look of piety on their faces, holding their hands in a prayerful attitude as they processed back to their seats. All of that only to be seen later acting in a manner unbecoming... I wondered then what was going on. They seemed to just be experiencing the “shell” of the experience. In conversations later I found out I was correct.

 

Faith, on the other hand, comes from a maturity of spirit that is not easily reached. It is a knowledge of the truth that comes from a place of knowing deep within oneself. A knowledge that does not require “proof”, one that doesn't look to pie charts and graphs for confirmation. It is a feeling of correctness that brooks definition or defiance. It comes from a connection with one’s true, higher Self. This connection comes with the love that I mentioned earlier.

 

This love is a direct link between our heart chakra (the energetic/spiritual heart area of our system) the love at this level is completely unconditional, meaning completely without conditions of any kind. It is all inclusive. It is the truest of loves. It does not wish to control or to judge. It just is and it allows everything else to just be.

 

When you reach this level of balance within yourself you vibrate at a higher level and because of that those around you will also. Your faith in your chosen religion becomes new, pure and sacred. You raise every thought, every word and every deed to a new level and growth, understanding and experience becomes a sacred and joyous exercise for you. I challenge you to examine your true, inner feelings in this area and decide where you truly are in your growth process, decide where you want to be and proceed accordingly.

 

Bright Blessings C. S. Roberts

 

© 2011 Chessie Roberts all rights reserved

 

GRATITUDE REALLY? FOR WHAT?

         GRATITUDE REALLY? FOR WHAT?

“Change your thoughts, change your life.” (Dr. Wayne Dwyer)

I was contacted by one of my clients recently who was feeling overwhelmed and not in a good space. She told me that cleaning house constantly was a very ungratifying job and she was very close to using the “H” word to describe her feelings on the subject. She then asked me what to do to turn that around for her. My response was to do it with gratitude, do it as a service of love, as a gift for life.

She stopped talking and just looked at me for a moment. Finely she blurted out, “Gratitude? Really? For what? A service of love? A gift for life? You’re joking right?

I asked her what her least favorite chore is and laundry was the answer. I instructed her to consider what goes into doing the laundry. She still didn’t see what I meant, and she told me to break it down for her, so I did.

“Be grateful for the fact that you have the physical ability to do the job. Be grateful for the fact that you have a washer and dryer to help you (I’ve had to do it all by hand and that is not an easy task). Be grateful for the fact that you can afford to pay for the soap, water and electricity to run the appliances that help you. Be grateful that you have the clothes and linens to wash and someone to wash them for. Be grateful for the fact that you have a home to house the appliances that wash and dry the clothes, and the storage containers that you keep them in, and those you wash them for. Consider that you really love the people for whom you are doing this service and, that to them, it is a gift from you to make their life better …do you see now what I am talking about?” I asked her.

I was met with a long silence and then she said “Oh, now I get it, I think maybe laundry just might be my favorite gift of love for my family, thanks.” I answered, “You are welcome.”

This will work with anything you are feeling bad about, anything at all. The reason it works is because as you change the way you think about something, the way you think changes. You actually create changes in your brain chemistry for the better. As your chemistry changes, shooting ‘grateful chemicals’ into your system, your feelings change, your attitude changes and you feel better about what you’re doing. These changes in you will spill over on those around you so that everyone benefits from this seemingly unimportant decision. Why not give it a try and experience the Bright Blessings, Love, service and gratitude that comes with that change of mind, C. S. Roberts

© Chessie Roberts 2011, all rights reserved

STAYING IN THE NOW

          

         STAYING IN THE NOW; YOUR NOW

This is a subject that seems to be in the foreground of a lot of seekers lately and one I too am working on. I find that 'staying in my now' helps me stay consciously aware of my thoughts and where they are at any given moment.

Just like everyone else’s, my mind wanders of its own volition, most often in the direction of what is next on my to-do-list and I have to gently bring it back to 'now'. The other direction is also often problematic, as in what “should I  have done instead of…”

I have found that the body, mind connection can be a difficult thing to harness; much like attempting to gently guide a rambunctious toddler or herd rabbits. It is a process, like so many others, of constant awareness and action. Every time I catch myself in one of these ‘off directions’ I MUST stop that process and come back to my now. This needs to be done with love, understanding and compassion and forgiveness for our self. It should also be done without judgment or criticism, there is too much of that flying around out there as it is.

As I continue to remind myself of the importance of staying in my now, without judgment, apology, explanation or analysis of myself, I will attain the state of calm, clarity in the now for which I am searching. And here, I challenge you to do the same, love yourself, be gentle with yourself and become consciously aware of staying in your “now”. You will find great peace as well as wonderful opportunities for spiritual, mental and emotional growth. Bright Blessings, C. S. Roberts

©2011, Chessie Roberts, All rights reserved

TO MOTHERS; A SPECIAL GIFT FROM THE UNIVERSE

                                  TO MOTHERS

          A SPECIAL GIFT FROM THE UNIVERSE


By Chessie Roberts of Evolution of Self; Journey into Body, Mind, Spirit Balance

Here’s to that first very personal, fleeting question teasing at the back of awareness, “Am I? Could it be possible? Now?

Here’s to the thrill of knowing and telling everyone, “Yes, I’m expecting! To the preparation, the waiting the celebrating, the wondering, Boy? Girl?

Here’s to the unique bond that is forged as you feel them grow, there, just under your heart all the while filling it, expanding it to dimensions never dreamed of before in your imaginings.

Here’s to the finding out and the realization that your life is about to change in ways you can only imagine.

Here’s to finding out you were so off the mark, those changes are more wonderful and terrifying that anything you could have thought up.

Here’s to the ‘firsts’, all of them the tiny and the huge. The ones that were important to them as well as the ones important to you.

Here’s to that gut wrenching paradigm shift that comes the first time you say/do something your mother used to say/do and you now truly understand the ‘why’ of it.

Here’s to the smiling support for their grand plans and the secret terror that they might get hurt. The pride in their accomplishments and the secret relief that your fears were for nothing.

Here’s to standing straight and tall, pride shining from you while you weep inside as they step out…

Here’s to watching them start their lives, on their own, in their own strength and with their own honor.

Here’s to stepping aside to enjoy learning their new family traditions and smiling warmly at the ones that they have held on to from the traditions that you taught them.

Here’s to laughing in private at their expectation of family, at their attempts at parenting while supporting them through their perceived failures. Holding them up and helping them find their strength in their new roles.

Here’s to attending the games and performances, babysitting and watching as their children grow into the wonderful people they are meant to be.

Here’s to the grace to becoming Grammie, to allowing them just to be. And through it all…

Here’s to that unique, special, indefinable bond, that special LOVE that makes you Mom. Happy Mothers’ Day

© Chessie Roberts 2011, all rights reserved