How Do I Love Unconditionally?

      

        HOW DO I LOVE UNCONDITIONALY

                                            © Chessie Roberts 2012, all rights reserved

1) Change your way of thinking about love, see it as an action rather than a feeling. If you see love as an action, you are rewarded when you feel a certain way based on the way you acted. Because this an action that you choose to take, you can repeat it anytime you wish. You are depending on self, not someone else.

2) Realize that what is a loving act toward one person, may not be so for another. So pay attention to what your best course of action is for the person in front of you. Each person is different so, conversely, your action(s) will be too. For instance; the saying “Hope you're hungry.” can be a friendly invitation to a meal. But under different circumstances can be a very cruel taunt.

3) Sometimes, out of this love with no conditions, you will have to step out of your comfort zone in order to help the other person step out of theirs. We can not stave off discomfort and or pain always. Comfort and love are entirely two different things, one is not predicated upon the other so that we may evolve as human beings.

4) Because of the “un” prefix, you must give this love without expectation nor can you pick and chose to whom or what you extend your unconditional actions or affection. Because this is not a one size fits all kind of thing, you will have to step back and decide first what is best for you. You can't be in a space of love if you are out sync with your own core values.

5) Now here is the one that will make you think I have lost my mind...forgive. Forgive them, the event and yourself. Forgiveness is not something we do, it is something we are. I don't mean be a door mat, I mean not holding on to those black thoughts and feelings that will obscure you ability to love.

6) Last, wake up and pay attention to how you feel. The feeling of unconditional love will lift you to heights you never thought possible, it will never leave you feeling down, drained or upset. The more you practice all of this the easier it becomes and the longer it lasts. Remember it is an experiential process...you have to do it to experience it....to experience it is to desire to share it! Namaste, Chessie


“May the entire Universe be filled with Peace and Joy, Love and Light. May the light of Truth overcome all darkness! Victory to that Light! Jai!”

Life Lessons, Choices, Destiny, Karma and the Law of Attraction

                Life Lessons, Choices, Destiny, Karma

                          and the Law of Attraction

“Destiny is what we make of it, Karma is how we shape it and Law of Attraction is a tool we can use to achieve the end that we want.” (TR)

Adversity, Karma, luck, good or bad; whatever you want to call it is something that we all live with. Because we have choices at every crossroads, we can choose to be victimized by it or choose to use it for what it actually is, a life lesson from which to grow.

By choosing to turn your mind-set toward the positive you can turn any situation around, change a negative into a positive. By looking at each situation as your ‘next best thing’ you create a freeing and empowering thought process. This is the choice that allows you to take your own power back from any situation that seems to be “adversity or bad luck”. By feeling an emotion of a positive nature, you incorporate the law of attraction to drive manifestation that will create what you want. You create a fertile area of positivity that allows your new mind-set to flourish.

I have taught this lesson for many years now and this is how I learned it. Some time ago I thought I might have breast cancer and took steps to find out the truth of the matter. Anyone who has gone through this process knows how much wait time there is and how frightening that can be. While you wait your mind goes through all kinds of scenarios and possibilities and well-meaning friends tell you every horror story they have ever heard or encountered to the end that you are soon terrified beyond all reason and I was no exception.

My saving grace was, that because of Evolution of Self and the research I had done to create it, I realized what the fear was doing to my physicality and was able to stop it. Because your mind and body eavesdrops on each other all of the time and your body creates whatever your mind tells it to. Holding negative thoughts about a situation long enough for your emotions (your driving force) to become involved only makes those fears a reality. I made a conscious decision to choose to see this as my next best thing, thus giving my mind a new emotion to call on.

If I did have the heinous thing I would use my experience to help others in the same situation. If it turned out that I did not have it, I would use my experience to teach this lesson. The second I made that decision and voiced it to my husband, all the fear left me, and I stopped doing damage to myself while I waited. Because I was not living in a state of apprehension and fear my physicality was not creating the chemicals that would eventually make my fears my reality.

As it turned out I didn’t have it but the lesson is a valuable one that I embrace every day. In choosing to embrace what looked like something awful and turn it to my advantage, I was able to choose a better way and so can you.
Bright Blessings, Chessie

© Chessie Roberts, 2011, all rights reserved

The Season of Love

                        The Season of Love

The holiday time of the year is often referred to as the Season of Love, but should we not live in that season all of the time? This also begs the question, “What is love?” that is what we will discuss here.

The love to which I am referring is of the unconditional variety, the kind that gives without stipulations or judgments. It creates the binding force of love; a love driven by free, joyous acceptance of yourself and all around you. This love does NOT come from a place of need, want, or manipulation. This love, when you move in harmony with it, gives you the ability to let others grow at their own rate, to reach out to another without losing your center. You begin to feel that sense of wholeness and balance that you are looking for. You lose the desire to judge others by YOUR standards, and you are able to see all things as your “next best thing”. This type of love allows you to consider others as well as to be gentle with our expectations of ourselves. We find that we can empathize with the challenges and the joys of others. This love is our link between our intellectual self and our spiritual self.

Unconditional love is both a way of life as well as a state of being and is a conscious aware decision. When we choose to engage our will (a 3rd chakra issue) to direct the love of our 4th chakra to all of those around us, we find a great sense of inner peace and wellbeing suffuses us and radiates out to all with whom we come into contact.

We accomplish this true, pure, unconditional love when our ability to take responsibility for those actions that are truly ours becomes firmly established within us. When we can stop having the need to live our lives by committee and can follow our hearts truth without guilt or fear. It is when we can express love of ourselves and humanity without manipulation or require others to change in order to become worthy of it. It is when you do not feel the need to be in control of others, or it is no longer important that truth is subjugated to YOUR idea of what YOU feel it should be. Only when we are able to give and receive this unconditional love that is vital to our growth and evolvement, our actions become based on the premise that all people are deserving of love. We are at a level where we can forgive others as well as ourselves easily thus releasing emotional pain as just a part of day-to-day life and not hold it as something to be nurtured. Holding hurts and grievances benefits no one, least of all ourselves. Love heals, holding hurt destroys.

Let’s face it, you can’t really know anyone but yourself, so by taking everything and everyone (especially ourselves) less seriously, you can be yourself without letting another take your power. You are also able to see the difference in controlling yourself and NOT controlling others.

Balance means that you can temper your lower chakras pull with love and begin seeing change in wonderful ways. You know you are in balance when you no longer feel those pulls from your lower chakras and realize that you do, indeed, create your own reality and you can influence others.

The goal of unconditional love is to first find an unconditional love for yourself that will spill over to others, then be able to exercise tolerance and balance within your body, mind, spirit. And to realize the Devine Paradox that something that seems small is, in reality very large and the thing that seems very large is actually very small, and to then embrace the ability to allow things to just be what they are.

Bright Blessings, Chessie

©Chessie Roberts 2010, all rights reserved

MIND, BODY, SPIRIT BALANCE; WHATS’ THE TIE IN?

 MIND, BODY, SPIRIT BALANCE; INTRODUCTION

                         WHAT’S THE TIE IN?

So far in this blog series, I have talked about the body and a lot about the mind as well as a bit about spirit. I have even addressed balance, but what ties them together? What is the core that makes this a functioning, cyclical and renewing system? The answer is our energetic spine.

Just as the spine in our physical body carries the nerves and vessels that nourish and inform our physicality and mind so that we are functioning as well as possible, our energetic spine creates the conduit that connects spirit with biology so that we are linked in a balanced way. For this conversation we will refer to the energetic spine as our chakra (say chock- rah) system.

For the sake of keeping things in an understandable order, I will start at the bottom and work upward. I want to say before I get started that in working with the chakra system you will find that the learning and function will not be linear. While each chakra builds upon the ones under it, as well as depends on the ones above it, the “Ah-ha moments” that will occur during your studies will cause you to revisit chakras that you thought you were finished with. This re-visitation is a normal process and function of living, learning, gaining wisdom, and growing, so don’t let it throw you. As you progress through each level of your chakra system, you will have more and more of these insights that will lead to more growth, learning and sharing.

As I have told you before, Evolution of Self; Journey into Mind, Body, Spirit Balance is an experiential processes that uses many different philosophies and this is only one of them. I feel that you will benefit a great deal from a better understanding of how you work as a whole. Your body and mind need spiritual connection in order to create the balance that is required for a balanced, whole, happy life style. The following chakra blogs will just brush the surface of each level, the classes go deeper, but there is usable information that will benefit you.
Next week I will address chakra 1. Until then,

Bright Blessings, Chessie

©Chessie Roberts 2010 all rights reserved

WHEN I AM THE ENEMY WHO MUST BE LOVED

WHEN I AM THE ENEMY WHO MUST BE LOVED

CG Jung said, “That I feed the hungry, forgive an insult and love my enemy- these are great virtues. But what if I discover that the poorest of beggars and the most impudent of offenders are all within me, and that I stand in need of the alms of my own kindness; that I myself am the enemy who must be loved- what then?”

As we grow and learn how to become the best person we can become, we often find ourselves in the position of being our own worst enemy; weak and “most impudent of offenders”. Not only that, but we realize that we are the ones who put ourselves in our current state of needing love, healing, understanding and forgiveness.

Self-love, kindness and forgiveness are things that we learn to suppress in our culture. They are seen as being selfish and self-serving when in actuality you must love and forgive yourself before being able to truly love another. Sort of like putting on your own oxygen mask before helping the person next to you on a plane. This wisdom is born of maturity, healing, growth and experience.

Maybe it is then, when you feed, heal, love and forgive yourself first that you are strong enough to give to others. If your well is dry, if your need is great then you don't have much to share; but still, if you attempt sharing while caring for yourself, you will receive what you need and grow.

Bright Blessings, Chessie
© Chessie Roberts 2010, all rights reserved